Q: How do you get 30 Israelis into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s air-tight.

Q: How do you get 30 Americans into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s got oil in it.

Q: How do you get 30 French into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s not in Iraq.

Q: How do you get 30 Europeans into a telephone box?

A: Tell them there’s no fighting involved.

Q: How do you get 30 Russians into a telephone box?

A: Tell them there’s a slice of bread in it.

Q: How do you get 30 peace protesters into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s the American Embassy.

Q: How do you get 30 Turks into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s not an airbase, honest.

Q: How do you get 30 Kuwaitis into a telephone box?

A: Tell them there’s an Iraqi coming.

Q: How do you get 30 Iranians into a telephone box?

A: Tell them to do it in the sacred name of Allah.

Q: How do you get 30 reporters into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s in Baghdad.

Q: How do you get 30 Palestinians into a telephone box?

A: Tell them if they do, you’ll liberate the Occupied Territories.

Q: How do you get 30 Indians into a telephone box?

A: Tell them it’s got Rajinikanth in it.